Noices News

Research Student Waves at Crush While Cycling: Falls into Ditch 

India’s premier research institute witnessed its first casualty of this year’s valentine season in the form of Golu Dhol, an obese, 7th year PhD student, who injured himself by riding his cycle into a ditch, while he was attempting to wave at his fellow research scholar and alleged crush, Sundari Trilok. The incident occurred a little past midnight on New Year’s Eve in front of the new girls’ hostel. Golu was cycling on the road that leads from Nesara to the Juice Center when the incident occurred. 

 The only other real eye witness to the unfortunate event was Sundari Trilok herself. The Noices investigating team spoke to Sundari to get her view of what happened that fateful night. “I was exiting my hostel and about to take a turn onto the road that goes towards Nesara when I noticed my labmate Golu cycling down the road looking very forlorn. I smiled at him and suddenly he took one of his hands off the bike handle to wave at me. Before I could react, I saw that he veered completely out of control and went straight into one the ditches on the side of the road. I immediately rushed to where he fell and attempted to help him get up. It was difficult for me alone to lift up his heavy frame (not cycle frame). My hopes went up when I saw a security guard approach us with a flashlight in hand. But, the guard just came, shined the flashlight on Golu’s unlocked cycle and took it away to the basement and locked it up while Golu continued to moan lying in the ditch. Finally, I called four of my sturdiest admirers to help me carry Golu to the health centre.” explained Sundari. 

Golu who is currently recovering from his physical wounds at the health centre denied any charges of negligent driving or roving eye. Golu said, “I have waved at Sundari many times in the past and never fallen into a ditch. I blame the cycle shop owner who did not repair it properly when I had given it to him to fix a loose nut. I sent my friend Ishant Haddi to ask the cycle shop owner to pay for damages.” 

Noices team spoke to Golu’s friend Ishant and he said “I had gone to the cycle shop to speak to the owner. But as soon as I went there, one of the employees came towards me with the hose of the cycle air pump in hand, looked at me with wide open eyes and said “Haan…hawa bharna kya?”. Man, I did not even have a cycle with me at that time! So, I just turned around and came back running before he could do anything to me.” 

The initial security report that detailed the incident did mention the cause of the accident to be a “loose nut”. Noices investigators approached the cycle shop owner (this time, we went with a cycle). The cycle shop owner strongly denied having done a shoddy job of fixing nuts in Golu’s cycle while his wide eyed assistant filled air into the Noices investigator’s cycle tire and demanded 2 rupees. 

When approached, the security office assured the Noices team that they were doing everything to ascertain the real cause as to why Golu lost control of his cycle while waving at Sundari. When updates last came in, the sentence in the security report that mentioned the primary cause of the accident to be a “loose nut” was still unchanged.